sarabear (sarabear) wrote,

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ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow





i could write a song about my last couple of days.. =P this entry will be short because i can barely lift my left arm up to the keyboard. stupid hickman line.

my surgery went ok, i suppose... when the surgeon finally came in to meet me, i explained to him where i wanted the hickman to exit my chest. i pointed at the big ass scar in between my boobs, and he just looked at me as if i were crazy. "i never put my lines there. ever. i've been doing this for 12 years and i'm *NEVER* done anything like that"

such a wonderful thing to tell the patient right before they start operating. i was already getting drugs from the anesthesiologst (or however you spell it ), so i freaked out, starting crying, and begged for my parents to come back in the room. my parents brought my doctor with them, and my doctor made the surgeon tell me that he could do it. and he did. but the fucker gave me stiches at the entrance site when he *could've* used steri-strips. so, i think it was his personal way of getting back at me for telling him how i wanted him to do his job. asshole. it's my body. and what girl wants a big gaping hole on the top of her boob? no make-up can cover that up. people would think i had warts every time i wore a low cut shirt.

but, that's over with.

the rest of tuesday evening i don't remember because i was taking perkisets ever 4 hours, and i passed out around 8.


onto the radiation...


i basically have to stand straight up in this plexiglass block for 15 minutes on each side while they zap a beam of light at me. it wasn't fun yesterday because i was dehydrated and i hadn't eaten anything, so i was puking the day away. the doctors forced me to get an IV bag of saline, and today went much better. i'm just so glad that it'll all be over tomorrow.

waking up at 6am sucks my balls. =P

i might not be updating for awhile cause on saturday i'm going to be admitted into the hospital. i'll get nasty ass chemo for 3 days, and then tuesday the 13th i'll get my stem cells *hopehopehope*

but i'll email everyone and let them know when they can come visit me.

sleepy time for me now... my lorezapam's kicking in.

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